The adventurous life

I have always been a dreamer. As a little girl I spent lots of time imagining what my life would be like...my husband, kids, career. I would picture myself living in exotic locations married to prince charming. And as I grew up, the dreaming continued but became a little more realistic.

The one thing I always dreamed about and desired was adventure. I didn't want the status quo lifestyle. I wanted to experience new things, travel to new places and explore the "road less traveled". In college I really felt as though the Lord was calling me to something different, and I began to dream about missions. I remember having lunch with the Young Life director of South American countries and longing for the time when I could go. Nothing sounded more exciting.

There was one little problem...it just didn't seem to be what God was calling me to do. One of the evidences of that was a handsome guy named Michael. As much as I prayed that the Lord would take away this "distraction", He didn't. In fact, God continued to affirm this relationship and strengthen my feelings for him. I will never forget sitting in my apartment discussing the possibility of me going to South America with Young Life for 2 years when Michael told me to stay. I clearly remember him saying, "wait for me". And it wasn't in a jealous, prideful way but rather a prayerful suggestion that it just wasn't the right time.

So I didn't go, and the Lord had different plans for us. Greater plans. Fast forward about 11 years and here I am...a wife to a businessman, stay-at-home mother of 3, living life in the middle of the suburbs. Right back in the city where I grew up. A little different from the adventurous life I had planned, right?

But maybe not so different.

A couple of days ago we had a very chaotic evening (surprising, I know). Michael was away on a conference call and I was trying to get the 3 boys ready for bed. Levi and Ben had been very energetic so I turned on Veggie Tales in my room to get them to calm down a bit and so that I could do a few things in Graham's room and then get him to bed.

I was sitting in Graham's closet going through his clothes while he was crawling around the floor, pulling all the clothes off the shelves. Everything I would put up, he would remove. Meanwhile Levi and Ben didn't seem to be calming down and kept running in the closet, adding to the mess. The house was loud. Really loud.

And as I sat in the middle of the noise and mess, I felt a little stirring in my heart and it was almost as though God tapped me on the shoulder and whispered that this is my adventurous life. I could almost hear him say to me, "I have given you what you always wanted. I have given you adventure." l giggled as contentment flowed through me.

Tears rolled down my face as I fed Graham before putting him down. Have I missed it all this time? It's not that I have longed for some other kind of life or that I have regreted any plans the Lord had for me. I just thought my life didn't quite meet that life that I once thought I would have. But as I thought more about it, my life is definitely full of adventure. These 3 boys so close in age are more than an adventure!

"Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart". Psalm 37:4

He did give me the desires of my heart. Not in the way that I had planned but in the way He had planned. He knew the desires of my heart because He put them there. They were put there for Him to fulfill.

For the last couple of days I have been meditating on His revelation and praying that He would show me more. The truth is that even if I had 2 kids spaced a nice 3 or 4 years apart, life would still be adventurous because life with Christ is the adventure. There is no adventure more real or fulfilling than that.

A suburban housewife wasn't what I pictured for myself but it's more fulfilling than anything I could have dreamed up. In the midst of laundry, diapers, playdates and tantrums, there is a great adventure going on and I don't want to miss a minute of it.

Heavenly Father, thank you for the adventure you have given me and for the adventures that are waiting. Thank you for loving me and giving me the desires of my heart. I could think of no greater gift than the privilege of knowing Christ and living His great adventure. Help me to find the adventures you have waiting for me each day no matter the circumstances I am in. And help me to instill in my chidren a desire to walk in obedience to you, that they may also know the adventurous life.

Happy Father's Day!

Michael, I hope you felt extra loved today. We didn't do anything too exciting. We spent the morning at church and then went out to lunch. Today was one of those lunches that made us wonder why we ever eat out with these 3. You definitely didn't have a nice, relaxing Father's Day lunch...sorry about that! You ran a couple of errands this afternoon to take care of car stuff (typical of you to take care of us on your special day!) and then you were able to relax and watch some golf until the little ones woke up from their naps. It was a beautiful evening so we picked up a pizza and went to the park. As always, I loved watching you play with the boys!

Our boys are so blessed to have you as their Daddy. Honestly, I couldn't imagine a better Dad for our little guys. Their eyes light up when they see you, and they have more fun with you than anyone else. You are a kid at heart, and it shows when you play with them. Whether it's wrestling on the trampoline, playing at the park, going on bike rides or playing golf and soccer in the yard, you have just as much fun as they do.
But you aren't just fun. You are dependable and trustworthy. Gentle and full of compassion. Most of all, you love the Lord and seek Him as we raise these men. I'm so thankful that my boys have you to look up to and emulate. And I'm so thankful that I get to be on this parenting journey with you because you make me a better mom. We love you!

Gahweh is His Name

So I haven't been blogging much lately. I don't know why. I guess the truth is that I just haven't had much to blog about. Life has been busy but not spectacular. Does that make sense? Maybe I just haven't felt all that inspired. All the sitting-around-the-house after Levi's surgery sucked all of the inspiration out of me. Or maybe I'm just trying to figure out how this blogging thing fits into my routine.

Lately I have discovered that I'm doing a bunch of stuff but not doing any of it very well. And I don't like that. While I would love to be involved with everything and friends with everyone, this stage of life (or any stage for that matter) just doesn't allow it. I realized that I didn't have time to call some of my closest friends, but I was taking time to write posts on my blog. That didn't make sense to me. And I wasn't taking enough time to just sit and read books to the boys. To lay on the floor and play with them. To go on long walks. To build tall towers. I was being a decent mom but not a great mom.

So I decided that blogging needs to be an "extra". I enjoy it and find that it meets many of my needs, but I don't want to do it if it means that I'm not doing the most important things well. So if I'm able to blog every few days, great. But if not, then that's just fine too.

Right now our house is living in the world of Vacation Bible School. I love it. I absolutely love it. It's probably not cool to love VBS so much, but I do. It brings back so many memories from my childhood. All the neighbor kids and I piled into my mom's station wagon and headed to our Baptist church. My mom was always in charge of the music, and I thought she was famous. And I worked so hard to win an award for all of the friends that I invited. I still remember the sheer joy in receiving the sticker on my nametag for each verse I would memorize. What fun! I'm so glad that Levi gets to participate now. He's having such a fun time at Outrigger Island. I wish I could say the same for Ben and Graham, but since they are so little, the mornings have been very long for them. I have to hide from Ben every time I walk past his childcare room because he grabs on to me as though he's been away from me for days.

The boys have been walking around the house singing, "Gahweh, Gahweh is His name!". It cracks me up. I've been trying to get them both to say, "Yahweh", but they don't get it. Oh well.

And I was just distracted from blogging because I looked over at Levi playing with his cars and noticed that his hair was covered in baby spit-up. Then I noticed a big pile of it on the hardwood floor right by where he was playing. I do remember Graham spitting up all over the place about an hour earlier. I had cleaned Graham up but not the floor. Now Levi smells just delightful.

My life is glamorous. It really is. I need to clear my head. I think I'll go spend some time with Gahweh...